Exercise has been a difficult thing for a while now, after my supported housing staff insisted on nagging, and prompting about it. Clearly, in their eyes, my weight was unacceptable.
Something I realised recently though is that someone who persists in doing something you’ve told them (repeatedly) makes life harder … might actually just want to make life harder for you. Especially given all the other discrimination and maltreatment I faced from them (I’m not sure I’ve outlined this here, or that I’m going to). So that helped me feel a little more open to the idea of movement and exercise.
I haven’t been swimming in ages, and should probably start again. What I’ve been doing recently is allowing myself to do “mini workouts”. That might just be the movement tasks on Finchcare, or a 3-5 minute chair workout on YouTube. A creator I often return to is Thick Chick Fitness, because working out with a plus size person feels a lot better, and I get to support a Black content creator.
Another creator that’s helped me is on tiktok is Aims Walters. She’s also plus size, and shows her workouts. She talks about asking yourself “i wonder if” when it comes to exercise, removing barriers (such as keeping workout equipment available where you’d use it), and how it’s ok to just do what you can, even if it’s 30 seconds. All of that is pretty helpful for me to get started.
Something that floats around in my thoughts is the importance of movement and strength training for old age. Or to be able to walk Lulu to the vets if needed. Sometimes having a reason can help, for me.
In general, it’s not my favourite thing. I also won’t lose any weight eating the way I am right now. My “safe food” is always anything processed, and fatty – I often actually eat very poorly, but doctors don’t care because I’m overweight. I’m trying a gentle approach to increasing movement slowly.
PDA fae 
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