Something I worry about a lot is that my supported accommodation won’t be able to help me because I’m a PDAer.
They always reassure me that there’s time, that it’s just making slow and steady progress and I’ll get there.
I know that I’ll always be avoidant. It doesn’t feel like housework will ever not feel demanding. I can’t envisage not coping by avoiding the quiet obligations of life.
I don’t know where the balance lies with being PDA. What does ‘healthy’ look like in PDA? Would it be healthier to refuse to comply when people place demands on me more often? Would that help me to cope with this type of demand better? Is healthy a matter of finding the coping strategies that work for me personally, and then being able to do things?
Learning I’m PDA in my 30s feels like being left in the middle of a forest without a map. It’s totally uncharted territory for me – I have demand anxiety, I used to dissociate from now and now I’ve allowed myself to actually feel it, and it’s really There. Sometimes I feel like I made life harder for myself by listening to myself on this, and that it was a mistake to realise that I have demand anxiety.
Maybe it’s gonna get easier, but at the moment I’m very swamped by the DA about adulting and I just can not.
PDA fae 